Lost

Remember I told about some development that will see me through. Well, that has also got stuck. No response. No replies. Now what? Believe in myself? Have Faith? Hold on? To what!!! To whom!!! Forget it, all these are words, platitudes and simply ineffective balms. I am lost and gone!!!!

If I am not dead by now, it is only because all means of suicide are painful, and I am scared of that. It has nothing to do with courage or the spirit to fight.